Miss Tori x

Miss Tori x
A never ending story of deadlines, diets and devious men x

Thursday, 3 February 2011

I'm Obliged.

Obligation.

ob·li·ga·tion  (bl-gshn)
n.
1. The act of binding oneself by a social, legal, or moral tie.
2.
a. A social, legal, or moral requirement, such as a duty, contract, or promise that compels one to follow or avoid a particular course of action.
b. A course of action imposed by society, law, or conscience by which one is bound or restricted.
3. The constraining power of a promise, contract, law, or sense of duty.
4. Law
a. A legal agreement stipulating a specified payment or action, especially if the agreement also specifies a penalty for failure to comply.
b. The document containing the terms of such an agreement.
5.
a. Something owed as payment or in return for a special service or favor.
b. The service or favor for which one is indebted to another.
6. The state, fact, or feeling of being indebted to another for a special service or favor received.


Obligation. I think when most people think of that word, they think of a headache, of being bound to something, of being required to do something, of being restricted. I? I look at one word in particular out of every single word used in that definition. I look at moral. For me? If I feel obliged to do something, it's usually moral.
I feel obligated to do certain things, by choice. I think obligation can be as much of a choice as it can an order, or a document or a service. But nowadays, I feel like obligation doesn't mean shit.

People are obligated to be faithful... to be good friends... to treat others as they'd like to be treated... to be honest... to keep promises.... people should feel obligated to do plenty of things, but to me, it doesn't seem like people feel obligated to do much at all.


o·blige  (-blj)
v. o·bliged, o·blig·ing, o·blig·es
v.tr.
1. To constrain by physical, legal, social, or moral means.
2. To make indebted or grateful: I am obliged to you for your gracious hospitality.
3. To do a service or favor for: They obliged us by arriving early.
v.intr.
To do a service or favor: The soloist obliged with yet another encore.


This word 'favour' is interesting, I think that's how people see it nowadays, like they're doing their friend a favour by being there for their birthday, like 'oh, that's one good deed done'. I'm starting to think that my expectations of people are way too high, and that really most people don't feel obligated to you in any way, no matter how good a friend, partner, lover you've been. A person will do what a person will do, and there's not much you can do to stop them, you could be perfection personified but if they're going to shit on you, that really won't make a bit of difference. They won't even feel that bad about it, you will.

This thought makes me sad, but all in all I think I just have to get over it, it's how it is, and I can still try and be the best person that I can be, but it doesn't mean that every person in my life is going to return that favour, or even appreciate it. I don't intend to change, I just intend to make note and remember, from now on, the people who do seem to see obligation as a moral code in friendship/romance etc - and I'll give them that little bit extra of me, not even because I'd feel obliged, but because I'd want to.

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