kiss goodbye x

I've just come to terms with the fact that I've lost a best friend.

I've lost that best friend to a relationship. To a boy she met about four months ago.

To a boy who made her cry tears just a week or two in.. tears I dried.

I could go on with this 'to a boy' theme and write lots of disparaging comments about him but that won't get my friend back....
because it doesn't matter how much I (or the rest of her friends for that matter) hate him - it only matters that SHE is giddy in love with him, although she admits readily that her relationship isn't making her happy and that every day is a struggle.

I've watched the life literally drain out of her. I used to see this girl on average, three times a week.... now?... The last time I saw her was a month ago... and when I did? She was pale, drawn - she looked exhausted - it was horrible. The night ended badly - he caused a scene and she cried. But it was us, her friends who she ignored and didn't make contact with afterwards... she stayed holed up with him in their little two-dom; unhealthy as ever.

Thing is though... you can't force someone to care.
We only asked her to put herself first sometimes. She couldn't even do that.

But now, no matter what happens? She'll never again be the person I thought she was - and isn't that a bitch. Hurts doesn't it... maybe I put too much time and love and effort and belief, maybe even expectation into my friends - but I going to continue to do some because even though it hurts... I'd rather know where I stand.